Have you even agreed to do something that at the time seems like a great idea and then when you get there you dread it? I seem to do that more and more. I think it is mostly because I am in a rut. After a 9 hour day at work, I just want to come home and relax. But anything extra I do in my life is usually done after work. To be perfectly honest, though, I spend more time dreading after work activities than actually doing them. Jessica and I are doing a program together tonight at a county school. While I love doing these programs, it certainly makes for a long day. And to top it off, I have an all day training at work, so it will be a lot of confined time and energy. I guess age has something to do with this feeling. We used to have activities all the time when the kids were in school. We went to hundreds of football and baseball games, wrestling meets, musicals, concerts and plays. Looking back, I wonder how we managed. I think it is the little thing I like to call "automatic pilot". I put myself in this mode when I have lots to do. I just hit go, and try not to think about it. That may be the only way I am going to get through the day today. Of course a sore throat and waking up at 3:30 a.m. will not help. But by this time tomorrow, the day will have been spent, and I will be glad to have accomplished something. So, I am now putting myself on cruise and going for it. Wish me luck!

What I want my grandchildren to learn from me.

When you are a parent many pressures are on you to raise your child the proper way. There are manners to teach and basic educational skills, you have to educate your child about safety and how to utilize money, then there is life long lessons like staying healthy, being a friend and on and on. As a grandparent, many of those responsibilities are off your shoulders. A random thought that recently popped into my head has started me thinking about what I, as a grandmother would like to teach my grandchildren. What lessons do I think are important for them to remember as they grow? Being a list maker, I have come up with a list of the lessons that I would love to share with my grandchildren.
1. Learn how to enjoy your life. So many people go through life doing things that they think make them happy, or are designed to make others happy. How many people take the time to just think about their own life and the things that bring them enjoyment?
2. Find happiness in the simple things in life. Like a rain storm, or a bird singing. The smell of apple pie cooking or the words to a beautiful song. Enjoy the world that God has given you. . . the trees and their seasons, the water and its power, the sky and its many changes.
3. Realize that the greatest way to receive in life is to give. Practice how good it feels to help or support someone else in need. Appreciate what you have and share it with someone less fortunate.
4. Hold on to the people who love you and that you love. Find someone who makes you happy and content and keep them in your life.
5. Be grateful. Find something every day to be thankful for. It is the sad person indeed who cannot find something in their daily life to be glad about.
After all the trimmings are removed from our life, you know the "can't live without" things, it is important to be able to find happiness without them. Sure money, education and security are important, but to me the key to true living and happiness is about these lessons.
When I am gone, I hope Maddison and Mason can think back on some of the times we have spent together and remember how important it is to just be happy. Mom and Dad and the schools can teach the reading, writing and so on. But if I can help them find happiness in a book or writing in a journal, having and being a friend, or just enjoying nature then I will have done my job!

Homecoming parade 2010

What a beautiful day for a parade! Every once in a while Missouri weather smiles down on us and says: "See, this is why you stay here"! The day could not have been better if it had been painted by Norman Rockwell. It was sunny, warm (but not too hot) and the town was decked out in red, white and blue. There were floats filled with alumni, future alumni and fall athletes. The bands played and the horns sounded. Miss Maddison was selected by her teacher to be one of two students representing their class on the South Park float. We had the privilege of picking her up from school and taking her to the parade. It brought back memories of 25 or so years ago when our kids were young and we would take them to the parade. Aunt Bea and Uncle Scott picked Mason up and met us in front of Amanda's school to watch the parade. Randy even got to be there (for sad reasons, he left work to attend the visitation of his coworker who died on Monday). As we lined up to watch the parade, a friend of Mason's and her mother stood by us. The 3 years old played and ran after candy, while the adults clapped to the music and visited. The bands played the Spartan fight song and the politicians pumped hands and distributed leaflets. The football and softball players waved to the crowds. The only thing missing in the parade was horses. I don't remember a parade in Moberly without horses. There were a few dogs, but not one horse.

The event really made me appreciate living where I do. Rural communities might have some disadvantages, but they sure know how to put on a parade. The people were friendly, the drivers courteous and the crowd was well behaved. This is a memory to hold on to when people talk about eroding values in our country. They should be invited to the next small town parade.

Wake up call.

One of Randy's co-workers died yesterday. He was 57 years old and a long time employee of AECI. He got sick at work, and left to get medical care. Shortly after getting to the hospital, he died of a massive heart attack. He was a fine man and a friend of Randy's. Randy had spoken with him hours before he left work. It was a sad evening at our house last night and an eye opener for us both. Randy is working 70 hours a week on outage for 6 - 10 weeks. Those extra 30 hours a week are hours that he will never get back with his family, that he will never spend doing something he enjoys. He has no choice in working this much, since it is mandatory overtime. Randy is just a few years away from being able to retire. He has choices on how long he wants to stay. . . the longer he stays the more money we will have for retirement. But who can calculate your life expectancy? It is such a gamble to make those kinds of decisions in life. Do I stay to have a better, more secure retirement, or do I go ahead and retire and enjoy the life I have left? No easy answers. I wonder what the deceased co-worker would advise us to do? Does he wish he had spent his last day anywhere but work? I guess we will never know.

Education

I just watched a new Oprah show about the state of our educational system. It was fairly negative about teachers, and although they praised effective teachers, they placed a lot of blame on teachers in general. I am not sure how I feel about the media's take on education and teachers. On the one hand, I come from a long line of educators. From my grandmother, who taught English and Latin to my mother who taught 2nd grade for 25 years, my father who retired as a high school administrator and finally my sister who very recently retired as a reading specialist, I have been immersed in education for most of my life. I know how difficult it is to be an educator, and especially a conscientious one. But from a mother and grandmother's point of view, it terrifies me to know and hear about some of the poor teachers employed in our schools. What the show did not seem to cover was the difficult task that teacher's have. By this I mean the social problems, the paperwork, the poor environment, the "be all to all" attitude and the inherent politics in education. Why blame the teachers solely for the lack of performance? Don't parents need to take some of the blame for these problems? Unlike ages past, teachers now get to be nurses, social workers, counselors, behavior specialist and moral instructors to children. They get pressure and blame from parents and administrators. Their salaries are not up to standards and they often purchase supplies with their own money and spend evenings and weekends working without pay. I wonder what quality of teachers we could get if we did hiring like the NFL? The best get picked first and get paid the most. If you can't cut the mustard, you don't get selected. The prospective football players have a great deal of motivation to be the best. . . money, lots of it, fame, recognition and glory. It is just a sad commentary that we pay entertainers, atheletes and actors large sums, while teachers and other public servants can barely make a living. I don't think it is as simple as placing the blame on the teacher's shoulders. A good teacher can excel under poor conditions. But what blame do we place on absent fathers, addicted parents, parents who prop their infants and toddlers in front of the TV so their children won't bother them? How many children come to school and have never been read to at home? There is plenty of blame to go around, but don't single out the teachers. They are doing a job most of us can't or won't do.

Enjoying lunch at the Irondale (aka Whistle Stop) Cafe in Birmingham.

Sunday

Rainy days and Sundays. I have the entire day stretched out in front of me with no "to do's" on the list. I have several "want to's", but nothing pressing. Randy left for work early again this morning and as much as I would have liked to sleep in, I couldn't. You would think the sound of rain and the quiet hum of the house would have lulled me back to sleep, but no such luck. I read some chapters in the new David Baldacci book "Deliver Us From Evil", caught up on some new Oprah shows and sat on the porch swing to watch the rain. I have discovered a new blog spot "Cooking Books" from Farm Chick Kitchen. The author is a friend of mine (I use the term loosely, because although I consider her a friend, I haven't really spent any time with her in years). I am so excited to read her entries and keep up with her in this way. She writes about her love of cookbooks, and posts recipes and pictures of her kitchen magic. I can tell right now that I could live my life in front of this computer writing and reading.
The Grands are with their mom today. Even though it is nice to have some me time, I miss them so when they aren't here. Since Amanda started school, she now has Sundays off. Up until that time, we had the kids most Saturdays and Sundays, beginning when Mason was about 4 months old. It was a routine that we loved and now miss greatly.
I am counting down the days until Josh can be home with them. He will be flying in the second weekend in October and will be here for 3 days. It will be so hard for him to leave again, but he gets to return in November, and then has 2 weeks off at Christmas time. He is almost half way finished with this 6 month transfer, but may have to extend it if the work here is slow.
This economy has affected almost everyone I know in some way or the other. Even if one has a secure job (is there such a thing anymore?), there have most likely been reductions in some way. As a student of history, I know that all things cycle, and this time in our lives will change. There will be postive outcomes from this situation as well as negative. I think our country will be stronger for the changes (more fiscally responsible citizens for one), but there will be parts that we got used to that may not return (easy credit, unlimited shopping, job availability). If I live long enough, I will be reading about this time in our history and how it has affected the country. I love stories about the depression, the industrial revolution, and the World Wars. Maybe some day my grandchildren will read about this time in our country and wonder what it was like for their parents and their grandparents. I hope that they will be able to access this blog, so they will have a small idea of what it is like.